Until quite recently, my only knowledge of the Highlander franchise was derived from this cartoon, which made me proud of my rather watered-down McLeod ancestry and taught me to love Power Metal.
Then, last year, my world was blown open as, one hung-over morning, some friends introduced me to the original 1986 Highlander film. This was the film that started it all. For nine years, until Mel Gibson appropriated it for his own ends in Braveheart, Highlander was most of the world's only introduction to Scottish culture outside of whiskey and golf: a film in which the eponymous Scot is played by a Frenchman, and the only Scottish actor plays a Spaniard; a film in which The Villain (The Kurgan) puts the definite article in front of his name; a film in which the songs and additional music were from Queen.
Almost impressively, the sequels really go to town on spoiling it - and Highlander 5: The Source, which just aired on BBC1 this week (catch it on iplayer) put the nail in the coffin. Throughout the sequels there are massive inconsistencies - the third film even pretended the second film hadn't happened because it was so embarrassed by it's mythology. It gets worse because of the tinkering of the TV show that followed. But none of that is an excuse for Highlander 5.
Highlander 5 is basically The Fellowship of the Ring-meets-McGyver: Lost Treasure of Atlantis-meets-the Nativity story, with Mortal Kombat-style computer game fights, set in the underworld from the Blade films, with the motorcycle gang from Mad Max and Jafar from Aladdin (after he's enslaved himself as a genii), with the production budget of a single episode of Stargate SG-1. Which makes it sound a lot better than it is. The writing/plotting/re-use of footage makes The Room look well conceived. If the money had been spent on another episode of the kids' cartoon it would certainly have been better.
The fighting in Mortal Kombat is better than in The Source, so why not just watch this? Actually, go ahead, this really is quite watchable.
'The Guardian' in The Source basically makes the same mistake Jafar makes. McLeod doesn't make it. He wins. Oops spoiler.
The kind of writing the guys at The Source wish they'd come up with.
To it's credit, the washed-out colours and swoopy camera work were very clearly emulated by Catherine Hardwicke when she directed Twilight the year after Highlander 5 came out.
My advice is get some friends around and play a drinking game with this film. Take a shot every time there's a flashback. And every time the gang are driving awkwardly through a forest in a Volvo like an overgrown pack of kids on a family holiday. And every time someone says "There can be only one". And every time someone's buried somewhere inappropriate. And that time near the start when you see bare breasts for one second. Generally, whenever it surpasses itself in terribleness.
Be careful not to die though.
In the words of Duncan McLeod somewhere in the middle of the film,
“It’s all bullshit anyway. ‘There can be only one’. ‘The
Source’. It’s all a lie."
You've been warned. This is the trailer:
I think Kevin Sorbo sums it up for everyone:
(This isn't from The Source, even though it looks like it could be. It would have saved the film if it were.)
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